• For all things homely, visit my Life on the Home Front blog 
• For peace and solitude, visit my Seeking Silence blog
• For the wisdom of our Holy Father, visit Benedict Everyday
• Visit my page on Saint Therese and I will pray for you!

Advent and the dentist

Advent is a time of joy mingled with penance. A joy, because we can imagine nothing more sweet than the Christ Child and His Mother Mary’s bliss at his coming. Penance because we must strive to be properly disposed to receive so great a gift of his presence. In the tradition of the Church, we faithful have done penance before great feasts. Advent is the penitential season in anticipation of Christmas.

Yesterday I was at the dentist. Funnily enough, as I was lying there struggling to offer up what was a horrendous experience (I am virtually phobic about the dentist) I got to equating the dentist with the purifying purpose of Advent. During times of the year, such as Advent and Lent, God works on us in order to prepare our lives and our hearts to receive His Son anew. That means digging out the *bad* in us, in order to cleanse and purify. On a spiritual level, it is as if God has removed the crumbling facade (the filling which partly fell out of my tooth on Sunday) and had to dig deep to drill the rot out, just as the dentist had to. Now I am left with a bruised and painful face, and a bruised and painful sense of self. But just as the dentist didn’t deliberately wish to hurt me but did for my own God, so it is with God. But I feel so weak and fragile, like I might break at the slightest touch. I have to be careful with my tooth for a while until it settles; so I have to be careful with myself for a while too.

God allows us these times of mortification in order that we are made more fit for His service and His Kingdom. The majority of this purging, cleansing work will take place after death, in Purgatory, but God begins it in the here and now. What are exceedingly painful times are a means of our salvation. One can choose voluntary mortifications in order to hasten the work of God, but the mortifications which God sends to us are of infinitely more value because they are not of our own choosing. Voluntary penance is still very much in our control ~ submitting to God is harder, because it means letting go of self and choice and freedom. But ultimately the end result will be freedom in Christ.

I am greatly encouraged by the trials the Saints went through, and their personal battles with sin (because much of my personal experience is related to sin). If such holy men and women as these were picked out to struggle with trials and temptations, then I am in good company! During Advent, I shall pray and ask for their assistance and intercession. I just hope and pray that God will give me an equal measure of the strength He gave them.

God bless you!

U2 Tuesday: Walk On

I have decided to post a U2 video every Tuesday, as I am loving their music so much at the moment ~ enjoy!

And love is not the easy thing
The only baggage you can bring…
And love is not the easy thing…
The only baggage you can bring
Is all that you can’t leave behind

And if the darkness is to keep us apart
And if the daylight feels like it’s a long way off
And if your glass heart should crack
And for a second you turn back
Oh no, be strong

Walk on, walk on
What you got, they can’t steal it
No they can’t even feel it
Walk on, walk on
Stay safe tonight…

You’re packing a suitcase for a place none of us has been
A place that has to be believed to be seen
You could have flown away
A singing bird in an open cage
Who will only fly, only fly for freedom

Walk on, walk on
What you got they can’t deny it
Can’t sell it or buy it
Walk on, walk on
Stay safe tonight

And I know it aches
And your heart it breaks
And you can only take so much
Walk on, walk on

Home…hard to know what it is if you never had one
Home…I can’t say where it is but I know I’m going home
That’s where the heart is

I know it aches
How your heart it breaks
And you can only take so much
Walk on, walk on

Leave it behind
You’ve got to leave it behind
All that you fashion
All that you make
All that you build
All that you break
All that you measure
All that you steal
All this you can leave behind
All that you reason
All that you sense
All that you speak
All you dress up
All that you scheme…

Preparing for Advent

I have been reflecting on this over the weekend whilst on retreat…

Advent, as we know, is the season during which we wait in the darkness for the light to be revealed. Christ came into a dark world and is still needed in our dark world. Christ also comes with His light into our darkness, as He did with me this weekend.

I was talking to the Mother Abbess of the community I was staying with about light and dark, and she pointed out 2 things…

a) that darkness is necessary in order to see the presence of light
It sounds strange at first, but it is true! If you light a candle in a bright, light room, you will barely notice it…it will have little impact. But if you light a candle in a dark room, immediately the difference will become clear, and the light will be the central point, the focus of the room.
So it is with us. When life is all light and bright, we can fail to notice the impact that the light of Christ has in our lives. But when we are in a place of darkness, Christ’s light illuminates and provides a centre. It lights our way. But light also reveals things that are hidden ~ sometimes things that we want to remain hidden, and then light can be experienced as painful. When Christ shines His light into the deeper recesses of our lives/persons, it can feel exposing and frightening. Then it is important to remember that light is also warm, and Christ never reveals anything to us in order to harm us, but to healp and heal us.

b) that too much light blinds us
If we stare straight into the sun, we will be dazzled and blinded. If we saw the light of Christ in all His glory, we would be destroyed by His goodness and holiness. So God reveals Himself to us through a glass darkly. In a way He only illuminates as much as we can take. If He was to reveal all to us at once, our frail humanity would be overwhelmed. So we catch glimpses of His light along the way, moments of illumination, times of insight and awareness, but we are not blinded!

Advent is a good time to sit and wait in the darkness ~ in our darkness ~ for the coming of Christ. To be prepared to be illuminated; to also be prepared for Christ to shed light on our sins, faults and weaknesses, so that once revealed and confessed, they no longer have the power to damage us. But because of this, Advent can be a painful time, a difficult time especially if we truly give ourselves to it, without holding back. While everyone else seems to be rushing round preparing for Christmas and going to parties, it is counter-culture to do Advent as it truly needs to be done, to fast, to pray, to repent, and to just wait. But if we do, then God will bless us with the Light of Christ in our lives, which shines brighter than any tinsel or Christmas lights!

I will be posting reflections on Advent throughout the season, perhaps with a verse or thought for each day. I hope you will join me!

U2, for you…

Something is about to give
I can feel it coming
I think I know what it is
I’m not afraid to die
I’m not afraid to live
And when I’m flat on my back
I hope to feel like I did

And hardness, it sets in
You need some protection
The thinner the skin

I want you to know
That you don’t need me anymore
I want you to know
You don’t need anyone
Or anything at all

Who’s to say where the wind will take you?
Who’s to say what it is will break you?
I don’t know, which way the wind will blow

Who’s to know when the time has come around?
Don’t want to see you cry
I know that kiss is not goodbye

It’s summer, I can taste the salt of the sea
There’s a kite blowing out of control on the breeze
I wonder what’s gonna happen to you
You wonder what has happened to me…

I’m a man, I’m not a child…
A man who sees
The shadow behind your eyes

Who’s to say where the wind will take you?
Who’s to say what it is will break you?
I don’t know, where the wind will blow

Who’s to know when the time has come around?
I don’t want to see you cry
I know that this is not goodbye

Did I waste it?
Not so much I couldn’t taste it
Life should be fragrant
Rooftop to the basement

The last of the rock stars
When hip hop drove the big cars
In the time when new media
Was the big idea

That was the big idea

Chat Over Coffee…

Well, hello!

I have been really rubbish at keeping up with all of my blogs lately. I actually feel quite sad about it, as I love blogging, and receive a great deal of pleasure out of it ~ but sometimes, life goes through one of those seasons when other more pressing issues take priority, and I’m in one of those seasons right now. Plus my blogging “head” seems to have got up and gone. I can hardly think of anything interesting to write about! I just seem to be getting on with life and faith, praying and reading Scripture meditatively, rather than asking big questions or searching for answers. Until this week, even simple prayer had fallen a bit by the wayside, but over the last few days I have made that connection with God again. I think the distance had something to do with the fact that I really needed to make a confession! Once done, I felt a barrier had slipped away and was aware of God’s presence again.

So, what have I been up to? Work, for one. I am so busy in my professional life at the moment, and there doesn’t seem to be any let up. It certainly uses up my energy, but I am focused and performing to the best of my ability, and gaining a great deal of satisfaction from my job, so there are hidden blessings! Family too is always busy with one thing or another. My youngest daughter is getting married in a couple of weeks, so of course, preparations are underway for that, and yesterday the family were gathered for my youngest grandson’s service of thanksgiving at a tiny little country church (Anglican) where my daughter and her little family worship. It was really lovely ~ not a baptism, but a blessing (they have decided to let my grandson decide for himself whether he wants to be baptised whe he is older). I read the following poem at the service, which I think is delightful…

Children’s Song

We live in our own world,
A world that is too small
For you to stoop and enter
Even on hands and knees,
The adult subterfuge.
And though you probe and pry
With analytic eye,
And eavesdrop all our talk
With an amused look,
You cannot find the centre
Where we dance, where we play,
Where life is still asleep
Under the closed flower,
Under the smooth shell
Of eggs in the cupped nest
That mock the faded blue
Of your remoter heaven.

Ronald Stuart Thomas

I am one of my grandson’s sponsors, which as it wasn’t a baptism I felt able to do. I promised that I would help and support his mummy and daddy in caring for him, and be there for him, to love and to guide. One day he may decide to be baptised as a Catholic ~ who knows?

Jesus comes to you…

Remembrance Day

Kseniya Simonova, the winner of Ukraine’s Got Talent, and her tribute to the fallen in the “Great Patriotic War” of 1941-45.

Two Awards!!

I am blessed indeed

The first is from Mary at The Beautiful Gate ~ the Lovely Lady, Lovely Blog Award. Thank you, dear friend

The second is from Cathy over at A Bit of the Blarney ~ the Gorgeous Blogger Award! Thank you so much Cathy

In accepting this award I have to tell you 6 things about myself you don’t know. Now that’s a challenge…let’s see:

1. My most favourite food of all time is cheese on toast! I’m a simple girl
2. I have read the book The Nun’s Story about 20 times and will probably read it 20 more in my lifetime!
3. My favourite film is a German film called The Lives of Others.
4. I am very interested in former East German culture and would love to own a Trabant car
5. I hope to visit Berlin for our holiday next year.
6. I suffer from sleep paralysis from time to time, which is horrid

So there you are! I amsupposed to pass these on to a number of people, but unable to choose, I shall award it to everyone who reads this blog this week Have a blessed day, as I have!

Chat over Coffee

Hello and happy Saturday! It’s been a quiet couple of weeks on the blogging front, and this last week has been our half-term holidays, and I have been spending less time on the computer and more time with family, including a lovely visit from my sister and her family So, I have not deserted you all! Now let’s sit down and sip a nice, frothy cappucino together (or tea, if you prefer )

Actually, it’s nice to sit down and have a quiet day. I am tired, and I am still coughing (and have been for weeks now) I just can’t shake it. We’ve all had nasty viruses over the last month or so, and found that the cough lingers. My husband has it too, so we make quite a duet, coughing in stereo! I have found Covonia night-time medicine helps, as it has  sedative in it which enables you to sleep without coughing yourself awake. The only problem is, you wake feeling like you have a hangover! Oh to feel 100% well again! I need my strength at the moment, as life with an 8 month old is never restful, and there’s always something else to do. The dishes always need washing, the carpets always need hoovering, dirty clothes multiply overnight in the washing basket, and trying to keep meal-times interesting and varied becomes a challenge. It reminds me of the words of Saint Frances of Rome:

“It is most laudable in a married woman to be devout,
but she must never forget that she is a housewife.
And sometimes she must leave God at the altar
to find Him in her housekeeping.”

How true! It is the essence of “Domestic Church”! God is not just to be found in quiet places of prayer, but in the midst of baby sick, spilt food, mounds of laundry and dirty dishes…Even our Holy Mother had to do all the tasks of the housewife, adn it is through Her that our work is sanctified. That is why I love this picture, which depicts Mary hanging out Her laundry! If She could, then I can, and with a heart full of love and joy!

I pray that God will bless you today, in whatever you’re doing around your home

Sabbath Moments: Autumn

I have joined this weekly meme hosted by Colleen

Sabbath moments are a way of taking time, just “being” instead of “doing”. Sabbath time is time to rest in God, to enjoy God in silence or in nature. Sabbath moments can include: taking a walk, watching the sunset, sitting by the beach, listening to music. Sabbath moments can be a few minutes, an hour, a half a day or ideally a whole day!

Sabbath moments can be planned and they can come up spontaneously, like rounding a corner in the road and seeing a gorgeous rainbow. The word sabbath comes from a Hebrew word meaning “cease.” And that is what we need to do sometimes, cease our activity and live in the moment and breathe in God.

And my contribution for this week is taking time out today to enjoy God in nature, walking through the park and along the river and into town, and recording the Autumnal beauty around me as I went along! Enjoy!

Chat over Coffee…

Well, it’s been a little while…

The trouble with not blogging very often is that you get out of the habit of blogging. But it’s been good to have a break, and I don’t think I will go  back to blogging several times a week. The way my life is right now, I just don’t have the time, and it takes me away from other stuff in my life which is, at present, more important ~ work, family, Church ~ all busy, all full, all needing a greater percentage of Mrs. Pogle!

But today is Saturday and I have a rest day (the first in a while) and am alone in the house! What luxury I plan to do a little housework (not too much!) and then spend some quality time with God and pray in a more focused way, instead of praying on the hoof as I have been doing this last few weeks. Then I am going to watch a film this afternoon and eat some Thorntons chocolates…life can have its little luxuries once in a while. The film I will watch is one of my favourites ~ it’s funny, sad, poignant, quirky all at the same time: Goodbye Lenin

Later on I shall go to Mass. I am going to a different Church, one which isn’t very far away, but I haven’t visited before. It’s a Novus Ordo Mass, but I have heard positive  things said about the reverence with which it is said, and the respect the congregation have for the presence of our Lord, instead of the noisy chatter before the service. It may be a possibility for the weekends when there is no Latin Mass. Oh, I hope so, I sincerely hope so. I have tried so hard where I am, and have come to a point where I need to look elsewhere. Please pray for me, and especially that I allow myself to be guided by God and make the right choice.

So that’s me this week! Nothing deeply spiritual, nothing profound. It has been a whirlwind of a week, but God was there in the midst when I looked for Him. Sometimes, that is simply how life is.

“All things have their season, and in their times all things pass under heaven.” Ecc. 3:1

Beauty from my Garden

Just popping in to share this with you. My passion flower ~ blooming in mid October!

 

The Passion Flower with its various parts is seen as a symbol of Jesus’ scourging, crowning with thorns and crucifixion.

• The spiraled tendrils ~ the lash of Christ’s scourging
• The central flower column ~ the pillar of the Scourging
• The 72 radial filaments ~ the Crown of Thorns
• The top 3 stigma ~ the 3 Nails
• The lower 5 anthers ~ the 5 wounds
• The shape ~ the Sponge used to moisten Christ’s Lips with Vinegar
• The leaves (some species) ~ the head of the Centurion’s Spear
• The red stains ~ Christ’s Blood Drops
• The Round Fruit ~ The World Christ came to save
• The Fragrance ~ The Spices prepared by the Holy Women

Such symbols gave a specific focus of Christian faith to the religious sense of nature, and also provided a visual means of teaching the Gospel story in an era where there were no printed catechisms.

Need a smile today?

Then look here

poustinia of the heart

Life has become come increasingly demanding. I have a lot to think about. In order to do so, I need to withdraw into an inner hermitage for a while.  A “poustinia of the heart”, so I can hear God’s voice.

A poustinia (Russian: пустынь) is a small sparsely furnished cabin or room where one goes to pray and fast alone in the presence of God. The word poustinia has its origin in the Russian word for desert (пустыня).

I hope to find God within…meanwhile, I will only be blogging here: Seeking Silence 

ps: please continue ot post your prayer requests to St. Therese! Although I won’t be blogging, I will still be reading and praying xxx

I shall be back!

Chat over coffee…

Haven’t done this for a while!

I wish I could say I was in this idyllic scene, pouring coffee in a sunlit kitchen with my family wearing a beautiful long gown, but alas ~ I am sat in an office during my lunch hour, taking a break from the daily grind with my laptop! But my heart is in such a beautiful place, and I find myself wanting to share the vision with you. So this will be one of those chatty, informal just-what’s-on-my-mind sort of posts

I am feeling somewhat rested after a quiet baby-free weekend, just my husband and myself at home, pottering about, catching up with housework, shampooing rugs, baking cakes, making soup, watching “The Return of the King” on tv, and of course attending Mass yesterday…

It is the Mass that remains on my mind, as I find I am caught in a kind of Limbo between the Ordinary and the Extraordinary Form of the Mass. I recently started going to a Traditional Latin Mass in a village about 20 minutes drive away from my home, and was just bowled over by it. I think I have shared elsewhere that the Catholic Church, when I converted, was the home I had always searched for. The Latin Mass was like finding the best room in the house, the one where I felt truly at home and free to express my love to God in a very special way. I love the Latin Mass! Gradually, over the last few months, I have found myself struggling with elements of the NO Mass, and I was painfully aware of these things yesterday. I guess my biggest issue is that when I first went to a TLM, I felt a truly Catholic identity, going back through the centuries. Something very special and sacred. The NO Mass is so, so similar to an Anglican service I struggle to see that Catholic identity within it, apart from the consecration of the Eucharist. How did we get to resemble the Church of England so closely? Being a convert I don’t know the answer to that one…

I also struggle because of the level of noise in my parish Church before Mass, which makes it very difficult to pray beforehand and put myself in the right place with God. Of course I pray and prepare myself at home, but just a few minutes quietly kneeling before the Blessed Sacrament prior to Mass would be nice! With my eyes closed, I could quite easily be in Costa on a busy Saturday afternoon  I just think people have forgotten how to stop talking, and there are precious few truly quiet spaces left in life. That is why I value my time at the Convent so much. I have tried and tried to shut the noise out, and sometimes I manage to do it, but a lot of the time the noise level is such that I can’t find that still centre within myself.  I try instead to find reasons to praise God, such as the fact that folk ar friendly and communicative, but wish they weren’t quite so much before Mass! I could say more about awful worship songs form the 70s and 80s which make me think I’m back in the Baptist youth group I used to attend as a teenager, feeling called to wear a veil but not wanting to draw attention to myself (I wear a headscarf instead and save the mantilla for TLM), desperately wanting to receive communion kneeling but making do with genuflecting instead (which still marks me out as “different”, as does receiving on the tongue) and last but not least, questioning the role of Extraordinary Ministers of HC (I am one, but don’t feel at all comfortable in doing so anymore, so I will be resigning).

Oh, my dear friends, I don’t wish to sound unhappy or as if I am nitpicking. After all, I’m not talking about major Liturgical abuses here (thank God) but from that long analysis, it is obvious that my heart is troubled, and I am stuck in this not-very-pleasant place of only feeling truly at one with God in the Mass once a month! That doesn’t mean I will stop going to the NO Mass, as I still recognise my Sunday obligation. I also believe that Jesus is truly present in the Mass whichever form it is celebrated in, but I can see I will tussle with this for a while yet. 

On the subject of the Eucharist, the last time I was at the Convent I read a superb book, Jesus Our Eucharistic Love (link), which I gobbled up (in a spiritual manner!). The more I read, the more I was overwhelmed with the significance of the Eucharist. It really did blow me away ~ and then I discovered last week that the entire book is available on line. I would highly, highly recommend it…I may take passages from it and write some reflections! Take this, for example:

Holy Communion represents the loftiest point of this exercise of love, Whose consuming flames unite the heart of a creature and Jesus. St. Gemma Galgani could exclaim in this regard, “I can no longer avoid the thought that in the wonderful scope of His Love, Jesus makes Himself perceptible and shows Himself to His lowliest creature in all the splendors of His Heart.” And what may we say about the “exercises” of the heart of St. Gemma, who desired to be a “tent of love” in which she would keep Jesus always with her? She longed to have a “little place in the ciborium” to be able to stay always with Jesus. She asked that she could become “a flaming ball afire with love” for Jesus.

Well, that certainly was a chat over coffee ~ a little deeper than I had intended, but it has really helped me to just pour out what’s on my mind and in my heart today. May God bless you for listening, and I pray that you will have a day in which you experience the love of Jesus above all things

October 1st: Happy Feast day of our beloved St. Therese!

…may you be blessed today and every day through her intercessions!

Today I came across this beautiful painting of Therese, the most beautiful I think I have ever seen, by Leonard Porter. I pray it brings you blessings, too!

Please join me…

…for tea in my kitchen. Just click the picture

Saint Therese Novena Rose Prayer

Miraculous Invocation to St. Therese 

O Glorious St. Therese, whom Almighty God has raised up to aid and inspire the human family, I implore your Miraculous Intercession. You are so powerful in obtaining every need of body and spirit from the Heart of God. Holy Mother Church proclaims you “Prodigy of Miracles… the greatest saint of Modern Times.” Now I fervently beseech you to answer my petition (mention here) and to carry out your promises of spending heaven doing good on earth… of letting fall from Heaven a Shower of Roses. Little Flower, give me your childlike faith, to see the Face of God in the people and experiences of my life, and to love God with full confidence. St. Therese, my Carmelite Sister, I will fulfill your plea “to be made known everywhere” and I will continue to lead others to Jesus through you ~ Amen.

My Novena Rose Prayer

O Little Therese of the Child Jesus,
please pick for me a rose from the heavenly gardens
and send it to me as a message of love.

O Little Flower of Jesus,
ask God to grant the favors I now place
with confidence in your hands . .

(Mention specific requests)

St. Therese, help me to always believe
as you did in God’s great love for me,
so that I might imitate your “Little Way” each day.

~Amen~

St. Thérèse of Lisieux in Britain, 2009

a simple faith

I have been reflecting on what it means to have a simple faith, and this Psalm immediately came to mind:

Psalm 130/131 (New King James Version)
A Song of Ascents. Of David.

1 LORD, my heart is not haughty,
Nor my eyes lofty.
Neither do I concern myself with great matters,
Nor with things too profound for me.

2 Surely I have calmed and quieted my soul,
Like a weaned child with his mother;
Like a weaned child is my soul within me.

3 O Israel, hope in the LORD
From this time forth and forever.

This gives me great hope! After reading through a series of discussions recently on lofty concepts such as genetics and environment and their effect on conscience; science and theology; free will etc. and really getting nowhere, I decided that I am quite happy with my simple unquestioning faith.

I do not know all the answers, nor do I wish to. That skims to close to the sin of Adam and Eve, wanting to eat the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge, and know all things as God does.

I shall stick to my Rosary, my occasional Novenas, my simple prayers and conversations with God. I shall read my Bible in a spirit of being open to the Holy Sprit, and gladly lay down all that I don’t understand. I shall turn to the Catechism when I have a question I can’t answer and I will leave the great and profound matters to those who are wiser and more knowledgable than myself.

One of the things Bishop Brian spoke of when he preached at the Cathedral on Friday, was the child-like nature of Therese: she had little or no theological knowledge; she lived her life in the Carmel hidden from the world; she delighted in her littleness, seeing that God in His mercy stooped even lower to reach her; she desired only to be a daisy or a violet nestled at God’s feet, not a striking lily or a beautiful rose like the great Saints. My desire is to strive to be equally little, simple, child-like. Always aware of my nothingness before God, always aware of His infinite Grace and love for me.

“So it is in the world of souls, the living garden of the Lord. It pleases Him to create great saints, who may be compared with lilies or the rose; but He has also created little ones, who must be content to be daisies or violets nestling at His feet to delight His eyes when He should choose to look at them. The happier they are to be as He wills, the more perfect they are.”  Saint Therese

It is enough…